Written by Georgiana Thorpe Apreutesei
Qualified Person-Centred Psychotherapist
GTA Counselling | Atherton, Greater Manchester
September can feel like a fresh start.
New school year.
New timetable.
New teachers.
New subjects.
New opportunities.
For some young people, returning to school is something they look forward to. They may be excited to see friends, start a new year or take on new challenges.
For others, September can bring something very different: anxiety, uncertainty, pressure or a feeling of not wanting to go back at all.
And sometimes, a young person may not even know exactly why they feel this way.
They may simply say:
“I don’t want to go to school.”
That sentence can have many meanings.
It might mean I’m worried about the work.
It might mean I’m worried about someone.
It might mean I don’t feel like I fit in.
It might mean I’m exhausted.
Or it might simply mean:
“Something doesn’t feel right, but I don’t know how to explain it.”
Returning to school is a transition, and transitions can be emotionally demanding—even when they are positive.
We often think of transitions as exciting milestones.
Starting a new school, moving into a new year group or beginning secondary school can certainly bring excitement.
But change also involves uncertainty.
Our brains and bodies often find predictability reassuring. When routines, expectations and environments change, it can take time to adjust.
A young person might suddenly have to think about:
That’s a lot to adjust to.
Even a young person who appears confident may be experiencing some internal uncertainty.
Summer holidays often have a different rhythm.
Bedtimes may become later.
Mornings may be slower.
There may be more time for friends, family, holidays, gaming, hobbies or simply doing very little.
Then suddenly:
Alarm. Get dressed. Breakfast. Travel. School. Homework. Bed. Repeat.
The change can feel abrupt.
Sleep can be particularly important.
A young person who has become accustomed to going to bed later may struggle when they suddenly need to wake up early again. Tiredness can affect concentration, emotional regulation and patience, making the transition feel even harder.
Rather than expecting everything to return to normal immediately, it can help to recognise that adjustment takes time.
When we think about anxiety, we might imagine someone who is visibly worried or panicking.
But anxiety can look very different from one person to another.
A young person experiencing school-related anxiety might:
None of these signs automatically mean that a young person has an anxiety disorder.
There can be many explanations for changes in behaviour.
But significant or persistent changes are worth noticing.
Returning to school can also mean returning to expectations.
“You need to work harder this year.”
“You need to get better grades.”
“This year really matters.”
“You should be thinking about university.”
Young people may hear these messages from adults, teachers, peers and social media.
Sometimes the pressure is much more internal:
“I have to get everything right.”
“Everyone else is doing better than me.”
“If I don’t get good grades, I’ve failed.”
Academic achievement can be important, but a young person’s sense of worth shouldn’t depend entirely on their performance.
A young person can struggle with a subject and still be capable.
They can make mistakes and still be worthy.
They can have a difficult year without their future being ruined.
And they don’t need to have their entire future figured out at 14, 15, 16 or 17.
For many young people, the social side of school can be more worrying than the academic side.
Friendships can change during the summer.
Someone might have made new friends.
A friendship group might have changed.
A disagreement may not have been resolved.
A young person might be wondering:
“Who am I going to sit with?”
“Will they still want to be friends with me?”
“What if everyone has changed?”
These concerns can seem small from an adult perspective, but friendships and belonging can feel incredibly important during adolescence.
Rather than dismissing these worries with “Don’t worry about it”, it can be more helpful to acknowledge them.
You don’t necessarily need to solve the problem immediately.
Sometimes:
“I can understand why you’re worried about that.”
can be more reassuring than:
“I’m sure everything will be fine.”
For some young people, returning to school may bring a particularly serious concern: bullying.
Bullying can take many forms, including:
The emotional impact can be significant.
A young person experiencing bullying may feel frightened, ashamed, isolated or powerless.
They may also be reluctant to tell someone.
They might worry that:
“It will get worse if I tell.”
“Nobody will believe me.”
“People will think I’m weak.”
“My parents will make a big deal about it.”
If you suspect that a young person is being bullied, listening without immediately reacting can be important.
That doesn’t mean doing nothing.
Schools and appropriate safeguarding channels should be involved where necessary, particularly when a young person’s safety is at risk.
But alongside practical action, young people may also need somewhere to process how the experience has affected them.
When a young person is struggling, adults often want to make things better quickly.
We might say:
“You’ll be fine.”
“Just ignore them.”
“Try to be more confident.”
“Don’t worry about what other people think.”
These statements usually come from a good place.
But when someone is already overwhelmed, they can sometimes feel like another expectation.
Now they aren’t only expected to cope.
They’re expected to cope well.
A person-centred approach starts somewhere different.
It starts with listening.
They may need somewhere they can talk about what they’re experiencing without judgement.
A space where they don’t have to perform.
A space where they don’t have to immediately find a solution.
A space where they can say:
“I don’t know.”
“I’m angry.”
“I’m scared.”
“I hate school.”
“I don’t understand why I feel like this.”
“Everyone expects so much from me.”
And be met with curiosity rather than criticism.
This is one of the things I value about the person-centred approach.
The young person isn’t treated as a problem that needs fixing.
They are a person whose experience deserves to be understood.
There isn’t one perfect way to support a young person through a transition.
Every child and teenager is different.
But some approaches can help.
If they tell you something is wrong, resist the urge to immediately provide an answer.
Try:
“Tell me a little more about that.”
or:
“What has been the hardest part?”
Something that seems small to an adult may feel enormous to a young person.
You don’t have to agree with their interpretation of a situation to acknowledge that their feelings are real.
“I can see that this is really upsetting for you.”
can be a powerful response.
“Your brother never had this problem.”
“Other children manage.”
“Everyone feels nervous.”
Comparison rarely makes anxiety disappear.
Instead, it can leave a young person feeling that something is wrong with them.
Returning to school doesn’t mean every evening needs to be filled with homework, activities and achievement.
Downtime matters.
Young people need opportunities to decompress.
Rather than having one big conversation, create small opportunities to check in.
A walk.
A car journey.
Making dinner together.
A quiet conversation before bed.
Sometimes talking side-by-side can feel easier than sitting face-to-face.
Expectations aren’t necessarily bad.
Young people benefit from boundaries, encouragement and appropriate challenges.
The question is whether expectations are balanced with acceptance.
There is an important difference between:
“I believe you can do this.”
and:
“You must do this.”
Between:
“Let’s work out what support you need.”
and:
“You need to try harder.”
Between:
“Your education matters.”
and:
“Your grades determine your future.”
Young people need to know that their achievements matter—but that they matter independently of their achievements.
Not every difficult school transition requires therapy.
Sometimes adjustment, reassurance and support from family and school are enough.
However, counselling may be worth considering if difficulties persist or significantly affect a young person’s everyday life.
For example, if they are experiencing ongoing:
A young person doesn’t need to wait until things reach crisis point before asking for help.
At GTA Counselling, I work from a person-centred approach.
This means the therapeutic relationship is built around empathy, acceptance, respect and understanding.
For a young person, therapy can offer a space where they can explore their experiences at their own pace.
We might talk about school.
Or friendships.
Or family.
Or anxiety.
Or confidence.
Or something that they can’t quite put into words yet.
There doesn’t always need to be an immediate answer.
Sometimes the first step is simply having someone listen.
The aim isn’t to tell a young person who they should become.
It is to help them better understand who they are, what they are experiencing and what they need.
September is often presented as a fresh start.
New notebooks.
New uniform.
New goals.
New opportunities.
But young people don’t need to start the school year feeling completely confident, organised and ready for everything.
They are allowed to feel nervous.
They are allowed to need time to adjust.
They are allowed to have difficult days.
And they are allowed to ask for help.
The same is true for adults.
Returning to routine after a period of change can be challenging at any age.
Perhaps the most helpful thing we can do is replace the pressure to “get back to normal” with a little more patience and curiosity.
Instead of asking:
“Why aren’t you coping?”
we can ask:
“What is this experience like for you?”
Sometimes that question opens the door to a much more meaningful conversation.
If you or your young person is finding the transition back to school difficult, psychotherapy can provide a confidential and supportive space to explore what is happening.
At GTA Counselling, I offer person-centred psychotherapy for adults and young people aged 11+, with sessions available in person in Atherton and online across the UK.
You don’t need to know exactly what is wrong before getting in touch.
You can simply start with:
“Things have been difficult lately, and I’m not really sure why.”
That’s enough of a place to begin.
🌿 GTA Counselling – Person-Centred Psychotherapy
📍 Atherton, Greater Manchester
💻 Online across the UK
👥 Adults and young people aged 11+
Find out more or get in touch:
www.gtacounselling.co.uk
Returning to school involves changes in routine, expectations, social relationships and responsibilities. For some young people, uncertainty about schoolwork, friendships, teachers or bullying can contribute to anxiety or stress.
School anxiety can present in different ways. A young person may experience worry, irritability, withdrawal, sleep difficulties, physical complaints such as headaches or stomach aches, frequent requests to stay home or changes in mood and behaviour.
These signs can have many possible causes, so persistent or significant changes should be explored rather than automatically attributed to anxiety.
Listening without judgement, acknowledging their feelings, maintaining reasonable routines and creating opportunities for conversation can help. If concerns persist or significantly affect their wellbeing, speaking with the school or an appropriate professional may be helpful.
Take their concerns seriously and create an opportunity for them to explain what has been happening. Depending on the circumstances, parents/carers may need to involve the school and other appropriate safeguarding professionals. If there is an immediate risk to safety, seek urgent appropriate support.
Counselling can provide a young person with a confidential and supportive space to explore their feelings and experiences. Person-centred therapy focuses on understanding the individual rather than simply telling them what they should do.
No. A young person doesn’t need to arrive with a clear explanation or a list of problems. Sometimes the starting point is simply feeling that something isn’t right.
If you are concerned about a young person’s wellbeing, you don’t have to figure everything out alone.
Depending on the situation, useful sources of support can include the young person’s school, GP, appropriate NHS services, specialist organisations and qualified mental health professionals.
If there is an immediate risk of harm or a safeguarding concern, urgent appropriate support should be sought.
This article provides general information and is not a substitute for professional assessment or crisis support.
Written by Georgiana Thorpe Apreutesei
Qualified Person-Centred Psychotherapist
GTA Counselling | Atherton, Greater Manchester
September can feel like a fresh start.
New school year.
New timetable.
New teachers.
New subjects.
New opportunities.
For some young people, returning to school is something they look forward to. They may be excited to see friends, start a new year or take on new challenges.
For others, September can bring something very different: anxiety, uncertainty, pressure or a feeling of not wanting to go back at all.
And sometimes, a young person may not even know exactly why they feel this way.
They may simply say:
“I don’t want to go to school.”
That sentence can have many meanings.
It might mean I’m worried about the work.
It might mean I’m worried about someone.
It might mean I don’t feel like I fit in.
It might mean I’m exhausted.
Or it might simply mean:
“Something doesn’t feel right, but I don’t know how to explain it.”
Returning to school is a transition, and transitions can be emotionally demanding—even when they are positive.
We often think of transitions as exciting milestones.
Starting a new school, moving into a new year group or beginning secondary school can certainly bring excitement.
But change also involves uncertainty.
Our brains and bodies often find predictability reassuring. When routines, expectations and environments change, it can take time to adjust.
A young person might suddenly have to think about:
That’s a lot to adjust to.
Even a young person who appears confident may be experiencing some internal uncertainty.
Summer holidays often have a different rhythm.
Bedtimes may become later.
Mornings may be slower.
There may be more time for friends, family, holidays, gaming, hobbies or simply doing very little.
Then suddenly:
Alarm. Get dressed. Breakfast. Travel. School. Homework. Bed. Repeat.
The change can feel abrupt.
Sleep can be particularly important.
A young person who has become accustomed to going to bed later may struggle when they suddenly need to wake up early again. Tiredness can affect concentration, emotional regulation and patience, making the transition feel even harder.
Rather than expecting everything to return to normal immediately, it can help to recognise that adjustment takes time.
When we think about anxiety, we might imagine someone who is visibly worried or panicking.
But anxiety can look very different from one person to another.
A young person experiencing school-related anxiety might:
None of these signs automatically mean that a young person has an anxiety disorder.
There can be many explanations for changes in behaviour.
But significant or persistent changes are worth noticing.
Returning to school can also mean returning to expectations.
“You need to work harder this year.”
“You need to get better grades.”
“This year really matters.”
“You should be thinking about university.”
Young people may hear these messages from adults, teachers, peers and social media.
Sometimes the pressure is much more internal:
“I have to get everything right.”
“Everyone else is doing better than me.”
“If I don’t get good grades, I’ve failed.”
Academic achievement can be important, but a young person’s sense of worth shouldn’t depend entirely on their performance.
A young person can struggle with a subject and still be capable.
They can make mistakes and still be worthy.
They can have a difficult year without their future being ruined.
And they don’t need to have their entire future figured out at 14, 15, 16 or 17.
For many young people, the social side of school can be more worrying than the academic side.
Friendships can change during the summer.
Someone might have made new friends.
A friendship group might have changed.
A disagreement may not have been resolved.
A young person might be wondering:
“Who am I going to sit with?”
“Will they still want to be friends with me?”
“What if everyone has changed?”
These concerns can seem small from an adult perspective, but friendships and belonging can feel incredibly important during adolescence.
Rather than dismissing these worries with “Don’t worry about it”, it can be more helpful to acknowledge them.
You don’t necessarily need to solve the problem immediately.
Sometimes:
“I can understand why you’re worried about that.”
can be more reassuring than:
“I’m sure everything will be fine.”
For some young people, returning to school may bring a particularly serious concern: bullying.
Bullying can take many forms, including:
The emotional impact can be significant.
A young person experiencing bullying may feel frightened, ashamed, isolated or powerless.
They may also be reluctant to tell someone.
They might worry that:
“It will get worse if I tell.”
“Nobody will believe me.”
“People will think I’m weak.”
“My parents will make a big deal about it.”
If you suspect that a young person is being bullied, listening without immediately reacting can be important.
That doesn’t mean doing nothing.
Schools and appropriate safeguarding channels should be involved where necessary, particularly when a young person’s safety is at risk.
But alongside practical action, young people may also need somewhere to process how the experience has affected them.
When a young person is struggling, adults often want to make things better quickly.
We might say:
“You’ll be fine.”
“Just ignore them.”
“Try to be more confident.”
“Don’t worry about what other people think.”
These statements usually come from a good place.
But when someone is already overwhelmed, they can sometimes feel like another expectation.
Now they aren’t only expected to cope.
They’re expected to cope well.
A person-centred approach starts somewhere different.
It starts with listening.
They may need somewhere they can talk about what they’re experiencing without judgement.
A space where they don’t have to perform.
A space where they don’t have to immediately find a solution.
A space where they can say:
“I don’t know.”
“I’m angry.”
“I’m scared.”
“I hate school.”
“I don’t understand why I feel like this.”
“Everyone expects so much from me.”
And be met with curiosity rather than criticism.
This is one of the things I value about the person-centred approach.
The young person isn’t treated as a problem that needs fixing.
They are a person whose experience deserves to be understood.
There isn’t one perfect way to support a young person through a transition.
Every child and teenager is different.
But some approaches can help.
If they tell you something is wrong, resist the urge to immediately provide an answer.
Try:
“Tell me a little more about that.”
or:
“What has been the hardest part?”
Something that seems small to an adult may feel enormous to a young person.
You don’t have to agree with their interpretation of a situation to acknowledge that their feelings are real.
“I can see that this is really upsetting for you.”
can be a powerful response.
“Your brother never had this problem.”
“Other children manage.”
“Everyone feels nervous.”
Comparison rarely makes anxiety disappear.
Instead, it can leave a young person feeling that something is wrong with them.
Returning to school doesn’t mean every evening needs to be filled with homework, activities and achievement.
Downtime matters.
Young people need opportunities to decompress.
Rather than having one big conversation, create small opportunities to check in.
A walk.
A car journey.
Making dinner together.
A quiet conversation before bed.
Sometimes talking side-by-side can feel easier than sitting face-to-face.
Expectations aren’t necessarily bad.
Young people benefit from boundaries, encouragement and appropriate challenges.
The question is whether expectations are balanced with acceptance.
There is an important difference between:
“I believe you can do this.”
and:
“You must do this.”
Between:
“Let’s work out what support you need.”
and:
“You need to try harder.”
Between:
“Your education matters.”
and:
“Your grades determine your future.”
Young people need to know that their achievements matter—but that they matter independently of their achievements.
Not every difficult school transition requires therapy.
Sometimes adjustment, reassurance and support from family and school are enough.
However, counselling may be worth considering if difficulties persist or significantly affect a young person’s everyday life.
For example, if they are experiencing ongoing:
A young person doesn’t need to wait until things reach crisis point before asking for help.
At GTA Counselling, I work from a person-centred approach.
This means the therapeutic relationship is built around empathy, acceptance, respect and understanding.
For a young person, therapy can offer a space where they can explore their experiences at their own pace.
We might talk about school.
Or friendships.
Or family.
Or anxiety.
Or confidence.
Or something that they can’t quite put into words yet.
There doesn’t always need to be an immediate answer.
Sometimes the first step is simply having someone listen.
The aim isn’t to tell a young person who they should become.
It is to help them better understand who they are, what they are experiencing and what they need.
September is often presented as a fresh start.
New notebooks.
New uniform.
New goals.
New opportunities.
But young people don’t need to start the school year feeling completely confident, organised and ready for everything.
They are allowed to feel nervous.
They are allowed to need time to adjust.
They are allowed to have difficult days.
And they are allowed to ask for help.
The same is true for adults.
Returning to routine after a period of change can be challenging at any age.
Perhaps the most helpful thing we can do is replace the pressure to “get back to normal” with a little more patience and curiosity.
Instead of asking:
“Why aren’t you coping?”
we can ask:
“What is this experience like for you?”
Sometimes that question opens the door to a much more meaningful conversation.
If you or your young person is finding the transition back to school difficult, psychotherapy can provide a confidential and supportive space to explore what is happening.
At GTA Counselling, I offer person-centred psychotherapy for adults and young people aged 11+, with sessions available in person in Atherton and online across the UK.
You don’t need to know exactly what is wrong before getting in touch.
You can simply start with:
“Things have been difficult lately, and I’m not really sure why.”
That’s enough of a place to begin.
🌿 GTA Counselling – Person-Centred Psychotherapy
📍 Atherton, Greater Manchester
💻 Online across the UK
👥 Adults and young people aged 11+
Find out more or get in touch:
www.gtacounselling.co.uk
Returning to school involves changes in routine, expectations, social relationships and responsibilities. For some young people, uncertainty about schoolwork, friendships, teachers or bullying can contribute to anxiety or stress.
School anxiety can present in different ways. A young person may experience worry, irritability, withdrawal, sleep difficulties, physical complaints such as headaches or stomach aches, frequent requests to stay home or changes in mood and behaviour.
These signs can have many possible causes, so persistent or significant changes should be explored rather than automatically attributed to anxiety.
Listening without judgement, acknowledging their feelings, maintaining reasonable routines and creating opportunities for conversation can help. If concerns persist or significantly affect their wellbeing, speaking with the school or an appropriate professional may be helpful.
Take their concerns seriously and create an opportunity for them to explain what has been happening. Depending on the circumstances, parents/carers may need to involve the school and other appropriate safeguarding professionals. If there is an immediate risk to safety, seek urgent appropriate support.
Counselling can provide a young person with a confidential and supportive space to explore their feelings and experiences. Person-centred therapy focuses on understanding the individual rather than simply telling them what they should do.
No. A young person doesn’t need to arrive with a clear explanation or a list of problems. Sometimes the starting point is simply feeling that something isn’t right.
If you are concerned about a young person’s wellbeing, you don’t have to figure everything out alone.
Depending on the situation, useful sources of support can include the young person’s school, GP, appropriate NHS services, specialist organisations and qualified mental health professionals.
If there is an immediate risk of harm or a safeguarding concern, urgent appropriate support should be sought.
This article provides general information and is not a substitute for professional assessment or crisis support.